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Self Esteem Lesson From An Eleven Year Old
By Kim | February 17, 2008
I’ve always been in awe of people who exhibit consistent high self-esteem. My eleven year-old son falls into this category. Many times, I wonder how his self esteem is so high when I must constantly work on my self confidence. Anyway, my eleven year-old loves sports and usually excels at them. To top it off, he’s a consistent high performer in academics as well. He truly believes that he can do anything he sets his mind to and rarely gives up until he gets the results he wants. Unfortunately, during football season, he had a game where things didn’t work out as he expected and he suffered public humiliation as a result. Keep reading………
My son plays youth football and he had a stellar season. He’s exciting to watch, makes big plays, scores points, and serves as the ‘play maker’ on the team. Prior to this one football game, my son’s self esteem was off the charts. He truly believed that he’d continue to do well and if he willed it, then his team would keep winning games. Unfortunately, my son’s opponents focus on stopping my son during football games. One game - he had his poorest performance ever. The other team completely shut him down. To make matters worse, my oldest son and brother-in-law made a special trip just to watch my eleven year-old play (added pressure). Additionally, there was a new youth sports’ announcer who publicly broadcast each kids statistics.
Needless to say, my son was devastated when his team lost. The tears flowed. Then in front of family, friends, and spectators my son’s dismal game statistics were broadcast for all to hear. Momentarily, my son felt embarrassed. However, his high level of self esteem kicked in. He lifted his head up high, remembering the stellar defensive game he played. My young son CHOSE to focus on the positive things he did instead of being dragged down by his poor performance (as well as a little embarrassment). He CHOSE not to beat himself up over his performance. During this time, in spite of adversity, his self-confidence still shone through, causing others to still react to him in a positive manner.
What a lesson for me. We play ‘life’ every single day. We have good days and bad days - moments we cherish and moments we prefer to forget. When it comes to my self esteem, I know I couldn’t have reacted as my son did. With my fragile self-esteem the embarrassment of the situation would have weighed me down. The experience would probably reinforce my low self confidence. I’d get caught up in the negatives and then in my mind think of all the other reasons why I’m worthless in the first place.
From an eleven year-old I was reminded that I get to chose how I react, what I think, and how I feel after humiliating/embarrassing experiences that could harm my self esteem. My son also reminded me to always seek the positive in a situation. Also, he reminded me that life’s not perfect and neither are we; therefore, we shouldn’t be too hard on ourselves. We’ve got to roll with the punches and then keep going, because there will be other games (life experience) that will test our self confidence as well. The more we practice a positive response to a bad experience, the more our self confidence grows.
I’m extremely thankful for the lesson and I’m extremely proud of my son.
Topics: Self Esteem |
