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What Type of Talker Are You?
By Kim | January 19, 2008
Over the past year, I’ve been paying close attention to the type of talker I am. My goal in doing this is to improve my communication skills, as well as the type of person I’m striving to become. Over the years, I watched all kinds of talkers in action - the smooth talkers, the shit talkers, the big talkers, the wind talkers, the sweet talkers, and the trash talkers to name a few. Each type of talker has made an impression on me - either positive and negative. For instance, the smooth talker knows how to work
his/her communication to influence or get what they want; whereas the trash talker tends to rub people the wrong way.
Interestingly, I came across some fascinating information in my Bible Study guide this morning. The title of the section in my Bible Study guide is called The Four Tongues in which four types of speech patterns are discussed. While two types of talkers are encouraged, two are discouraged as well. Below is a summary:
1. The Wisdom Talker (the controlled tongue): these are people who think before they speak. They measure their words, they know when to keep silent, they are good listeners, and they give wise advice. Of course, we are encouraged to be this type of talker. These people have self control. They do not let their emotions get the best of their mouths. For me, I strive to be this type of talker.
2. The True Talker (caring tongue): these are people who speak truthfully while seeking to encourage. I believe these types of talkers are sympathetic to others feelings and put the interest of others before themselves. They care about others. Of course, we are encouraged to be this type of talker. For me, a wisdom talker that comes to mind is my grandmother. I think many of us probably have a caring family member or friend that can fit this bill. This is a person you can trust
- the type of talker that doesn’t necessarily always tell you what you want to hear, but tells you what is in your best interest.
3. The Two-Faced Talker (the conniving tongue): these are people filled with wrong motives, gossip, slander, and a desire to twist the truth. It’s scary, but I’ve run across many people who fall into this category in the workplace, especially when there is significant negative change and the threat of job loss.
4. The “I don’t Care” Talker (the careless tongue): these are people whose emotions contribute to what comes out of their mouths. These talkers lie, curse, are quick-tempered and often leave a path of destruction with the words they use. When I was younger, I was quick to run off at the mouth and say hurtful words that I wish I could have taken back.
Well, what about you? Which type of talker are you? Or, do you find yourself a combination of a few or all of the above? The fact of the matter is that people judge us and form opinions about us based on what we say (which is often compared to our actions). Therefore, we need to be sensitive to the fact that what we say probably affects more people than any action we take.
Have you ever been the victim of hurtful words? I know that I have and it can be downright painful. In as much, we need to pay special attention to our words and how we use them. Remember, everyone is labeling you some type of talker - so what do you want to be labeled as?
Topics: Communication Skills |
